My Problems

"Everyone got their own sets of problems ". That line sets me thinking.I am a weird guy.Awkward ,so to speak.Me in the real life and me in this virtual space are two different individuals.The me in this blog is more thoughtful,more emotional, and revealing.On the other hand,the me outside this world is a social retard,a reclusive and a shy introvert.However,if I were needed to name one major differences between the two me's , it would be the ability to express oneself .I realised long ago that I have this problem.The inability to convey one's thought properly.The inability to express one's self . The inability to communicate literally.

I tends to speed up in my speechs whenever I started talking.I dunno why .It might be due to my lack of confidence.My nervousness? Or maybe my sheer shyness?I wonder.To make things worst, I have this " Talk before you think " idea embedded in my head that makes me spurt out nonsense whenever I talk.This always annoy others after some time and when it comes to serious discussions especially.I know that I am capable of engaging into a serious conversation . I know that I am capable of posing some intelligent questions or discussing some smart things too. But when it comes down to expressing and conveying them, I screwed up... Big Time.More than often,those illogical and stupid things coming out fro my mouth will make me look like a ridiculous fool.Worst case scenario , it might even mislead others to misinterpret what I said as a mockery to them. I definitely hate this.

The funny thing is that although I know I have this problems and I abhor it , I have yet to be able to eliminate it.It is easier to be said than to be done.Perhaps the solution for now is to remain silent and say nothing at all ?Another problem of mine would be my tendency to chat with others,wanting to find out more about them.That alone isn't bad thing right?Yeah, but when coupled with my inability to communicate properly ,it turns out to be a big disaster.In retrospect , I have seen a lot of incidents in the past where I failed to convey my messages and what comes out from my mouth even turns out to be conflicting to my original thoughts.Truly,I do not wish to continue being like this.Neither do I have the intention of letting this problem to keep ruining my life nor do I like it keep haunting me here and then.

Up to now, I think the best solution would be to learn how others express themselves and incorporate those skills into my own.And one way to do that would be by reading.Of course,reading how others expressing themselves either in literature masterpiece or even a simple blog could help me a lot.Best of all, I wouldn't get bored reading them as I actually enjoy reading other's writing.I guess , the rest is up to the time to decide. I am looking forward to the day where I can finally convey my thoughts clearly,walking with confidence and able to speak loud and clear , without any sights of mumblings and uncertainties!

Time will change it! We will just have to wait!.